To all the drivers who accelerate when the person ahead of them puts on their signal to merge:
I hope you get crabs.
Sincerely, Me
Category Archives: Microblogging
Feeding Off Each Other’s Energy
My 5 year old is currently at that stage of development where “If big sis does it, it must be the best!” My 7 year old, meanwhile, is at the point in her development where her little sibling’s attention is starting to be enjoyable more often than annoying.
An unfortunate consequence of all this wonderful sibling bonding is that trying to get both of them to stop being rowdy at the same time is like playing the world’s least fun game of whack-a-mole.
Filed under Microblogging, My Life
Emo Tears Are Measured in Angst-roms
I’m starting to think some of that awful poetry I’ve been writing might actually be salvageable with a bit of work!
Please send help.
Filed under Microblogging, My Life
Darndest
5 year old, giving me a hug: “I love you, dad. You’re such a great dad.”
Me: “Aww, thank you baby. You’re a great kid, too.”
5 yo: “I just smelled the way you would taste if I were to eat you.”
Me: “O…kay…”
Filed under Microblogging, My Life
My Favorite Hat
I’ve had this hat for a long time now. My sister made it for me! As you can imagine, it gets lots of compliments.
Filed under Microblogging, Selfies
Hit Me Hard and Soft
Remember how a few days ago I mentioned being angsty? Yeeeaaaahhh, maybe not the best time to finally look into this Billie Eilish person I’ve been hearing so much about. Or maybe it was exactly the right time? I dunno.
Anyway. Whew! She’s good.
Filed under Microblogging, My Life
Who?
My daughter has an imaginary friend named “Fighter.” (He’s the pilot for all her favorite cars and Legos and so on.)
Fighter has a sister named “I Forgot.” Yes, that is her actual name. I checked.
Maybe she plays baseball?
Filed under Microblogging, My Life
In Search of Secrets 
Comments
I am tentatively re-enabling comments on my posts. I’ve set myself a few rules that should (hopefully) keep me from getting sucked in. The comment policy can be found here.
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Filed under Microblogging
Tagged as comments, policy