Tag Archives: funny

I Guess It Was Me

So, remember that missing “like” button I was talking about last week? Well…

The author scrolls through a WordPress article, then looks for the "like" button at the bottom, which is nowhere to be seen. Then he scrolls back up again, and a toolbar pops up prominently featuring said button. The author then proceeds to feel dumb.
From Kana’s Chronicles

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Alternative Revenue Streaming

So… Do any of you know what the market is like right now for skinny, 37-year-old, slightly-queer camboys? Asking for a friend.

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Design So Bad It’s Gaslighting

So there I am, reading someone else’s post on WordPress. I get to the bottom and start looking for the “like” button because I did, in fact, like it. I can see it’s been “liked” by about a hundred other people. I can even see which ones! And I can see that I’m logged in, so that shouldn’t be a problem.

And yet, there is no “like” button to be seen–no star, no heart, no thumbs-up, nothing. I look up. I look down. I look from side to side. It’s not anywhere!

I’m not sure if it’s me or the UI, but at least one of us is absolutely moronic.

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Tinder? I ‘Ardly Know ‘Er!

You Are:

  • Age: 20-50
  • Gender: girl or girl-adjacent
  • Sexuality: optional
  • Appearance: cute
  • Enjoys: cuddles, reading, being picked up, talking about stuff you like while I listen and smile and play with your hair, travel, saying sweet things about me and seeing if I can top them, really good food
  • Values: empathy, joy, Eliezer Yudkowsky’s Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality, art, the outdoors
  • Biggest flaw that isn’t really: likes to show off

You Might Like:

  • Age: 37
  • Gender: male
  • Sexuality: polyamorous, straight-ish
  • Appearance: 6’0″ (no, I didn’t just round up), 150 pounds (okay, I might’ve rounded that time), bald, blue eyes, as white as it gets without freckles or albinism
  • My friends describe me as: Great Dane, oaf, “actual dad”
  • Favorite compliment I’ve ever received: “suspiciously good-natured”
  • Biggest pet peeve: my own farts

If that sounds like you (or somebody you know) HMU KK thx luv u ❤

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Mal-Come Again?

Over the years, there have been quite a few contenders for “worst misspelling of my name ever,” but this one’s just taken the top spot easily:

A handwritten receipt for a Costco pizza phone-in order, with "Malechon" written at the top
😐

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Spooky Scary Skeletons

I walked out the front door the morning after Halloween and saw this:

A small rock in a gravel lot, with black marks and a second, smaller rock below it that give it a striking resemblance to a skull.
💀

The black stuff was charred-on ash. Where did it come from? Not a clue.

Should I exorcise it or use it as a decoration?

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My Daughter Thinks Jabba the Hutt Would Be Scarier With a Cape and a Lightsaber

Please, nobody tell George.

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Why Am I Like This, pt. X

The contents of a fun-size bag of Skittles, arranged in precise rows and sorted by color.
Eating sequence: top to bottom, right to left. One of each color first, then two different colors at a time, etc. Leave one of every color for last and eat them all at once.

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Why Am I Like This, pt. IX

*shares a meme on social media*

*scrolls through more memes, shares another*

*scrolls back, sees the meme I shared 15 seconds ago*

*has to check own status because I can’t remember if I actually shared it or just thought about sharing it*

*meme is about ADHD*

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Underheard

Sometimes I worry that I’m losing my hearing from listening to my music too loud. Then I do something like accidentally mute my headphones trying to turn down the volume when they’re already at the lowest possible setting, and I stop worrying.

(For an hour or two.)

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