I live a life of intrigue and suspense, full of exciting questions like “why did I walk into this room,” “what was the reason I picked up my phone two hours ago,” and “is that yellow stain on my nails orange peel or jaundice”
Tag Archives: relatable
Slamming Windows
I think my favorite thing about MS Windows is when you can’t do anything with a file or folder because “it is open in another program,” but it won’t say which program.
That’s the best!
Filed under Microblogging, Reviews
I Love My Coworkers
One of the folks on our office’s GSA group chat posted this:
Filed under Microblogging
It’s a Fact
My spouse: “I’m probably biased, but I genuinely think we have two of the cutest dogs in the world.”
Me: “You are absolutely biased, and also correct.”
Filed under Microblogging
Better Startup Idea?
Sometimes when I’m on the road, I really wish I had a car horn I could honk at just myself.
Frustrating day? Feeling sleepy? Missed your exit? Bad traffic that isn’t anybody’s fault in particular?
BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE(itsnotyouitsme)EEEEEEEEEP!
Filed under Microblogging
Why Am I Like This, pt. XIII
*goes downstairs to get phone and check weather*
*spends two hours scrolling social media, reading webcomics, and/or writing*
“Oh geez, I’ve got to get off my phone and start my day!”
*goes upstairs to get dressed*
*finds clothes already laid out*
*starts putting them on*
*debates putting on long underwear*
*goes downstairs to get phone and check weather…*
Filed under Microblogging
Making Coffee Be Like
Watch this poor, tired sap try not to lose track of the number of scoops he’s put into the coffee maker, on today’s exciting episode of “Can He Count to Four?“
Filed under Microblogging
In Search of Secrets 
Help, I’m Arguing With People on the Internet and I Can’t Get Up
“Views” is such a frustrating number to optimize for. What does it matter how many people see what you’ve said or done, if you don’t know how many people you’ve actually affected?
You know what a much more useful metric would be? “Number of minds changed.” That sure would be nice. It is so exhausting when someone’s wrong on the internet in a way that it feels so gosh-danged important to try to correct them, but is it really? You can sometimes tell if the person you’re arguing with changes their mind, but what about all the lurkers who never pitch in? Maybe you helped some other people’s understanding, even if you couldn’t get the OP to budge. Or maybe not! Who knows? It’s maddening!
Anyway, to completely and randomly change the subject: AI doesn’t need a personality or instincts or emotions or a desire for self-preservation or even consciousness to be superintelligent and wipe us all out; just because something has been in fiction a lot and has never happened before doesn’t mean it isn’t about to happen; and if some fatuous nimrod says a thing, that (by itself) is not evidence the thing is false. If you disagree, you are being Wrong On The Internet and if you would please just stop now it would save me a lot of aggravation. Thank you.
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Filed under Essays
Tagged as being wrong on the Internet, don't read the comments, funny, relatable, Writing